Wanna see some girl’s junk?

Did I have you going? Yes? No? Maybe a little? Were you thinking I was referring to some girl’s crotchetal zone? My spousal unit would not be too happy with that. What kind of pervert are you anyway?

One of my blogosphere friends Erin did something pretty neat a while back, back in my Angry Georgian days; she posted I’ll Send You Junk, You Post About It! Fun!
Okay, when I say a while back I mean June. I’m a bad, bad blogofriend. I set things aside sometimes and let them slip my mind. This morning I was scrounging through the myriad nick-knacks of my own junk on my desktop, culling things to throw in the garbage can (yet again), when I came across this little piece of junk – Erin’s junk.

When I checked my P.O. box that day I didn’t know what to expect. A small box? A key to a locker containing a bigger box? A pillow? Nope – just a little, normal, every-day looking letter-size envelope, with a bulge in the middle addressed to:

A cool button it is – a Spy Kids 2 (The Island of Lost Dreams) – cool enough for any kid to wear. Although, who wears buttons anymore? They were all the rage nearly twenty years ago but who on earth besides Applebee’s waitresses wear them?
Alexa Vega is on the front though, so that in itself redeems it. Hey, she’s twenty-one now – that takes the creepiness factor out of the equation, doesn’t it? And wow, IMDB just informed me that this movie was released in 2001. How old does that make you feel?
Danny Trejo was in this movie too. Seems kinda weird, but whatever.
The button claims I can OWN ALL THE FUN! I assume by owning all the fun the marketeers are referring to buying a copy of the movie and helping to line their pockets. It’s always fun to make money for someone else, isn’t it? I don’t see the fun in it. Now if we were talking about owning Alexa Vega, that would be a completely different story.
And there they stand, Alexa Vega and Daryl Sabara, in the foreground with lightning shooting upward from the mouth of a volcano (would have been cooler if it were actually erupting), what looks like two people standing on a flying too-fat surfboard, and three helicopters. Something is perched precariously on the edge of the cliff behind Daryl Sabara, but the bog green oval with On video & DVD Feb. 18th! is strategically placed so as to block its identity and leave you wondering. Between Daryl Sabara and said cliff stand two skeletons, facing the non-erupting volcano and a large metal beetle with green eyes sits atop Daryl Sabara’s right shoulder while he stands there, cool as ice, staring off into space with his sunglasses on.
Alexa Vega on the other hand, doesn’t need anything between her and the volcano. You don’t need anything extra to draw your attention to her side of the button. She was a cutie eight years ago, cute enough to make her side of the button glow all by its lonesome.
And the sun shines brightly in the cloud-filled sky, brilliantly from behind the title of the movie.
The rim, in small letters, proudly proclaims Printed in U.S.A. © Buena Vista Home Entertainment, Inc. H6228 and in really tiny letters, ASSEMBLED IN MEXICO.
And that is the rundown on Erin’s junk. I hope you enjoyed this little review by the man in the institutional white tee shirt.
Please go visit Erin’s blog, Blogging is for Dorks. And thank you Erin – this really was fun!

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